thoughts

They always know how to get you. smash you against the wall and kick you in your belly. twist your arm that its broken. they make you feel miserable, alone. no one to help and no one to see. helpless like a young fox caugt by some merciless beast ready to kill. at the moment you think help is gone, no one left to safe you and you think life ends, something, someone, is just on time to rescue you from a death that is so horrible that no one ever wants to die in such a way too. ruthless killers, broken smiles.
there the angel steps in, and im not saying god is my religion, but its true. at the mment of total desperation nature's defence systems shake of the dust and roll out their paws. they will help you survive. hard work, total exhaustion, its worth it.
my defence rolled out and stepped up the last month. two people I know died, one close related person got sick and I got thrown away by some fool who thought my issues were not important enough to solve. but I got defence. it stretched and saved my tears, pain, and made me feel good again. Love came by, and decided to stay for a little while, who knows for how long.
but this life is celebration. its designed to smile, designed to party. Designed to enjoy the smaller things, but also the greater ones. The nature of living will always stay and we'rust predators, fighting to survive. We will survive. Whether if its alone, together, dead or alive, we'll make it. and there's no one to stop me.
for now and forever we'll smile. and never surrender.
amen.